I'm Easily Amused

Check out Margie's mileage!

And in case you needed another example of how I am not the nerdiest member of my household- J pointed out that in binary, this is 64.  You're welcome.

The Verdict Is In

I hate my hair.

I certainly can't blame the stylist, because she gave me exactly what I asked for (except for maybe the bangs- they are a little thin).

Turns out, I just don't like what I asked for.  These bangs are making me crazy, and the layers, while nice immediately after drying, just don't hold up well overnight.

This is a problem.  I am a nighttime showerer.  I just can't get going early enough in the mornings to leave time for showering and hairstyling.  SO, I shower and dry my hair before bed.  With my old hairstyle, this worked.  I could put my hair up in a ponytail while I slept, then just brush it out and go most mornings.

This new hairstyle requires work.  Me no likey.

The bangs just do funky stuff overnight, while my arm is flung over my face.  And the layers don't do well in the ponytail, and come out looking all funky in the a.m.  (I can hear you suggesting that I forgo the ponytail, but I get too hot with all that hair on my neck while I sleep.  I'm a hot sleeper.)

So, just to make sure we're all on the same page:
1. Long, naturally wavy hair (with a few long layers) takes FOREVER to dry.  Desperate to try keratin straightening treatment.
2. Purchase deal and get longed-for keratin treatment.  Hair is definitely straighter!  Maybe a little too straight.  I've cut back on styling time, but not quite as much as I'd hoped for.
3. New haircut adds significant styling time.  Bangs and lots of layers are kinda fussy.
4. The growing out begins as the keratin treatment fades.  In a few months, I will be back to long, naturally wavy hair (with a few long layers).

Ah, the circle of life.

The next stop on my hairstyle train: long, sideswept layer in front as bangs grow out, longer layers a la Jennifer Aniston.

Because It's Monday

And because I both went to sleep and woke up on the wrong side of the bed...


You get a lazybones A-Z post today.


A. Age: Forever 29.
B. Bed size: King.  I adore the big bed.
C. Chore that you hate: Vacuuming the stairs.  What a pain in the arse.
D. Dogs: Daphne and Delilah.  Cute sometimes, annoying at others, but oh my does the nugget love them.  (As do I.)
E. Essential start to your day: Coffee.  With fiber.
F. Favorite color: I'm the girliest type of girl.  Pink, all day, every day, pink.
G. Gold or Silver: I enjoy them both.
H. Height: 5'3"
I. Instruments you play(ed): I played the cello as a youngster, and I was awesome at it.  Wish I had never given it up.
J. Job title: Teacher.
K. Kids: My nugget, Gabriel.  7 months old.
L. Live: North Cackalacky.
M. Mother's name: Debbie.
N. Nicknames: Betsey, B.
O. Overnight hospital stays: Only for the birth of the babe.
P. Pet peeves: Bad spelling and/or grammar.  Brown belts with black shoes.
Q. Quote from a movie: "Well THERE'S a surprise.  I think I'm gonna have a heart attack and DIE from that surprise."  Guess the movie!
R. Right or left handed: Right.
S. Siblings: I'm the oldest of four.  Two younger brothers and one younger sister.  My siblings rock.
T. Time you wake up: 7:00.  Unless the wee one wakes me earlier (which isn't too often) or the husband lets me sleep later (which is every weekend).
U. Underwear: I'm a fan?
V. Vegetable you hate: Beets make me vomit.  For realz.
W. What makes you run late?: I'm not a morning person, so getting out of bed in the first place is a struggle.  After that, I want to snuggle my kid, which makes me late(r).
X. X-Rays you've had: Lots.  Aside from teeth, there was also an elbow, a foot, an arm, a knee...
Y. Yummy food that you make: I make lots of yummy stuff.  Cooking is my thing.
Z: Zoo animal: My faves are the otters, polar bears, and all of the primates.  I seriously heart the zoo.

My Husband Has a Crush On "New Girl"

'Tis true.  Although she is not his number one (that spot is reserved for me some girl from the "Firefly" series), she definitely makes the list.

I'm okay with this, because I'm cool like that.  (And also because I have a list of my own.)

And truth?  After watching "New Girl" last night, I might have a little crush on her, too.

I find this show to be adorable.  If you haven't watched, "New Girl" is played by Zooey Deschanel.  It's the story of nerdy, awkward, kooky Jess, who moves in with three young, happening guys.  This is only allowed to happen, by the way, because she has model friends, and the guys think this may give them an in.  They soon realize that they're in over their heads, however, as just-dumped Jess cries on the couch while watching "Dirty Dancing."

Two things I especially love about this show:
1. There is a Douche Bag jar, which the guys are forced to contribute a dollar to every time they say something douchey.  (Which is not infrequent.)
2. Jess sings all the time.  She makes up songs as she goes, even making up her own theme song.  This is a girl after my own heart, as J will tell you that I am constantly doing just this.  (Although I haven't made up my own theme song yet...hmm, something to think about.)

Bottom line is, J and I both laughed out loud on several occasions, which I view as a marker for a good show.  We will be watching again!  Check it out Tuesday nights on Fox.

Book Review: Bossypants

Let me just say that the book starts out with Tina Fey explaining how, based on the maxi-pad commercials on TV, she expected her first period to appear as a blue liquid.  And imagine her dismay when that was not, in fact, what appeared that fateful day.

This lady is funny.

Bossypants is an autobiography of sorts.  But not in the sad-sap-woe-is-me-my-parents-screwed-me-up kinda way.  Tina Fey writes about the major milestones in her life in a very humorous way. 

I learned about the struggle of women trying to make it in the comedy industry- I didn't know they had it so rough!

I learned about how "30 Rock" came to be- turns out, it was all because of Alec Baldwin.

And I learned about Tina's hilarious portrayal of one Sarah Palin on SNL- and the aftermath that followed.  (There was a tiny bit of vulgarity here in response to media scrutiny of this funny parody.  Tina may have told a particular reporter to "suck a bag of dicks," and I may have snorted my beverage right through my nose...)

My favorite chapter was both funny and depressing.  Tina Fey states that since turning 40, she has to immediately take off her pants when she gets home.  She looks back longingly to her 30's, when this was not a necessity.  I, apparently, hit this milestone early.  Since turning 30 (or, who am I kidding, since college), my "real" pants come off and my yoga pants come on immediately upon entering the house.  Such is life.

All in all, I enjoyed this book.  Tina Fey is smart and witty, and this was just plain fun to read.  Four out of five stars!

Equality

When have you ever known my blog to get political or controversial?  What's that?  Never?  Well, you're right there.  But I recently read an article that compelled me to make some of my thoughts known, and in a public way.

The following quote, from holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel, spoke loudly to me: "I swore never to be silent whenever and wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation.  We must always take sides.  Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim.  Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented."

North Carolina, what is up with this whole proposed constitutional amendment banning the recognition of any same-sex unions?  This is such a disappointing turn of events, seeing as how gay marriage is already illegal in the state.  Is it really necessary to spend your precious legislative time barking up this tree?  Is this really the most important issue we have to deal with, in a state where unemployment is topping 10%?

I cannot possibly compete with the eloquence of this article, so I will not try to.  But I implore you all to read it.

And I will say this: I so look forward to the day when two people who love each other- ANY two people who love each other- are granted to the right to stand up in front of their families and friends and declare their love for one another, sealing their union into a legal marriage recognized by all.  

And when this proposed amendment hits the ballots this May, I sincerely hope to see it go down in flames.
 

Inappropriate Things Kids Say, Vol. 4

Student A: "Mrs. A, can I pleeeease go to the bathroom?  This is serious.  I feel like I'm gonna pee on myself."

I, of course, allow the student to go to the restroom to avoid an accident.

Student B: "Well THAT was awkward."
_________________________________________________

Comment after reading a book about caring for our pets, who need love:

"Love doesn't mean kissing.  It means hugging.  And when there's kissing, that's the disgusting part."

I love kids.

Emmy Fashion Recap

Awards show season officially kicked off Sunday night with the Emmy Awards.  Oh, how I love award shows and the accompanying fashion.

Let's get right to the good stuff:

Best Dressed Ladies:

Elisabeth Moss in Marchesa.  I LOVE the nude color and sparkly sleeve detail.

Julia Stiles in Georges Hobeika.  The lavender lace is so pretty, and the scalloped detail at the neckline is gorgeous.

Julie Bowen in Oscar de la Renta.  This one is getting mixed reviews, but I am a lover.  I think the beautiful beading paired with the simple hair was perfection.  I find the neckline to be sexy without being too over the top.

Kate Winslet in Elie Saab.  The red, the sleeves, the neckline...it just all works.  Simple and so chic.

Martha Plimpton in Zac Posen.  Remember her, the geeky girl with the glasses in "Goonies"?  Well, she's come a long way since then.  This wine-colored sequined gown is stunning.  Love me some cap sleeves.

Sofia Vergara in Vera Wang.  Here's a lady that knows how to work her curves.  I love how the silhouette of this gown accentuates her amazing hourglass figure.  

Worst Dressed Ladies:

Amy Poehler in Peter Som.  I believe this is supposed to be sequins, and the silhouette is beautiful, but it really comes off looking like blue pleather.  This one is also getting mixed reviews.  I, however, am not a fan.  Ick.

Juliana Margulies in Armani Prive.  Maybe I'm just not high fashion enough to get this dress, but the large crystals on the stiff bodice just don't do it for me.  They look like over-sized aquarium jewels.

Melissa McCarthy in her own design.  I love this girl.  She is funny and lovely and wonderful.  But this dress is doing her no favors.  It looks a little like a sack.  Shapeless and frumpy.

Kyle Richards in Ines Di Santo.  Apparently she styled her hair simply to avoid looking "overly fussy."  Um...hello?  This gown is swallowing her up!  This look is the epitome of overly fussy.  Why is she even there, anyway?  Last time I checked, there was no Emmy category for "Reality TV's Biggest Bitch."

Best Dressed Couple: 

Jon Hamm and wife Jennifer.  He looks classically handsome in a Tom Ford tux, and she looks lovely in vintage Helena Barbieri.  A delight for the eyes.

Worst Dressed Couple:

Heidi Klum and Seal.  I give her props for wearing a past Project Runway winner's design, but Christian Siriano, I am sad to say that I DO NOT find this fierce.  It looks like an over-groomed poodle is clutching to her hemline.  And Seal?  For the love of fashion, BUTTON UP!  Quasi-nude is no way to show up to the Emmy's.

Worst Dressed Hostess:

Jane Lynch in four slightly different Davis Meister downs.  All bad.  Sparkly, haltery, badness.  Sorry, Jane, but I gotta call 'em like I see 'em.

Gabe- Seven Months

What?  I'm 7 months old already?!

7 months and happy.

And now I'm outta here!

PHOTO.

SHOOT.

OVER.

Well, folks, this is the month that Gabe became almost a big boy.  He is almost crawling.  He is almost ready for table food.  And he is almost the cutest baby in the world.  Wait...scratch that.  He IS the cutest baby in the world!

Some of Gabe's newest tricks of the trade:

He's an army crawler.  He uses his arms to pull himself around the room.  He frequently gets up on all fours and rocks back and forth, and he occasionally makes one or two crawling motions, but he is not yet a full-on crawler.  Any second now...

And since the boy is on the floor, moving here and there, he does not have the luxury of being upright to turn his head around and see what's going on in all directions.  Enter what J calls his "sexy pose."

Sexy Pose.

Gabe will stop scooting long enough to lean in such a way that he can look to see what's going on behind him.  He does it all the time, and it's hilarious.

The nugget is still an eater.  He's tried just about every form of Gerber baby food (stages one and two!) and many of my homemade variety.  Carrots aren't really his thing, but he has yet to refuse anything.  This past week, we have introduced puffs.  These are merely a precursor to Cheerios.  They come in different flavors (we have banana and sweet potato), and just dissolve more easily than the O's.

Gabe L.O.V.E.S the puffs.  He literally squeals with excitement when he sees the tub coming his way.  Like a flash, as soon as the puffs hit the tray, his little fists reach out to grab them.  The problem is just that- he is using his fists to grab them, and then has lots of trouble opening the fist to get the puff into his mouth.  He doesn't yet have that thumb-forefinger-pincer grasp.  So for every 20 puffs that I give him, he probably only eats three or four.  But practice makes perfect, and the boy is sure happy to keep practicing!  It's beyond adorable, even if it does make me feel a little bad for the guy.  (I may occasionally put a puff into his sweet little mouth so he can avoid the rigor of trying to get it there himself...but only because I want to, and I'm the mama, so I can.)

We finally got Gabe a doorway jumper.  The kid seriously enjoys the jumping.  This is what a typical twenty minutes in our house looks like:

If he's not jumping, he's playing on the floor.  And although he has about a million toys, leave it to Gabe to find a piece of junk on the floor that he'd rather play with.  Other favorites include dog toys, shoes, my laptop cord, and Daphne's crate.  But whatever he finds these days, he's gonna play with it...as long as it doesn't belong to him.

Like father, like son.  Desperately trying to figure out how to work the X-Box controller.

After all this playing, we're left with a tired boy and a happy sleeper at the end of the day.  The boy has started pulling his hair when he's tired.  Always above his right ear.  So he frequently has sticky, messy hair sticking out the side of his head.  Love.

Gabe's "There's Something About Mary" hair, only not as disgusting.

Since he is getting so big (and so mobile) we have officially ditched the swaddle.  He now sleeps in footy pajamas (Aaah!  Can't stand the cuteness!), and prefers to be on his stomach.  He will happily sleep this way for twelve hours.

Yes, we are supremely lucky.  In so many ways.  Love this kid.

The Reveal

BANGS!  Here they are.

Me, looking just like Carrie Underwood.

Adjusting to feeling hair on my forehead, and trying to convince myself that I don't need to start growing them back out tomorrow.

Time For a Change

Since I was a mere tween, I have been a yo-yo haircutter.  As in, grow it out, chop it off, grow it out, chop it off.  I have twice donated a massive amount of hair to Locks of Love.  For me, it has always been go big or go home.

When I got engaged, I started growing my medium-length hair out so that it would be long enough for any updo come wedding day.

And I've been gun shy ever since.

I've grown and grown, with only a trim here and there.  I just can't bring myself to go short again.  (Also, J says no to me cutting all of my hair off.)  But I am feeling that pull towards something new and different.  So I've made an appointment for this weekend.

My big change?  BANGS, and some more face-framing layers (a la Carrie Underwood- see below).

What's that, you say?  This is hardly any different than my current haircut?  Yes, I realize this.  But for now, it's the best I've got.

Also, bangs are a big deal!  And I am sure that I will LOVE them.  (That is, I will love them for about a month, at which point I will begin the process of growing them out again, as evidenced by the multiple times I have gone through this whole 'bangs' process.  Such is life.)

Stay tuned for pictures!

New Look

These days, I not only feel like a new look with my hair, but also with my blog.  I enjoy this funky blue bird!  Bear with me as changes are made...

Missoni Madness

Yesterday, Target launched it's limited edition Missoni line.

If you don't quite have your finger on the pulse of the high fashion world, Missoni is an ultra-luxe high end Italian fashion designer.  Missoni pieces are, of course, uber expensive.

That is, until now.

Missoni designed a 400-piece line for Target.  Now these pieces are affordable!  So affordable, in fact, that Target was bombarded yesterday with hoards of people looking for "luxe for less."  The Target website reportedly crashed repeatedly as consumers were scrambling to pick up their very own piece of Missoni.  Stores were crowded to the max, and lines looked like those one might see on Black Friday.

Craziness, no?

But you might be thinking to yourself that this sounds like a line I would find myself in- but here's the kicker.

I don't like Missoni.  To me, Missoni = ick.

I believe their pieces to be weirdo throwbacks to the 70's, and not in the good bellbottoms-are-back kinda way.  Everything is knit.  As in, sweater pants.  No, thank you.  Also, everything is stripey or zig-zagged.  Again, I'll pass.  AND, their color and pattern combinations are utterly unappealing.

Here are a few pieces from the new Target line:

What do you think?  Worth braving the madness for?  Or just plain ugly?

Read more about the Target frenzy here.

We're Hipster

Okay, if you are laughing after merely reading the title, I wouldn't blame you.  Those of you that know us know that J and I are not so much hipster as we are lame.  We go to bed early- even on the weekends.  We listen to classic rock and are completely out of sync with any modern music.  We wear khakis. 

Yesterday, while perusing Babble (I heart Babble!), I came upon this list of the Top 20 Hipster Baby Names.  Of course, I clicked, because I had to see what the Hipsters are naming their kids these days.

I was SURE that none of our (very few) beloved names would appear on this hip list.  After all, agreeing on a name for Gabe was like an act of congress.  J has all these rules (no last names for first names, no rivers, no religions, and on, and on, and on...) and I have a weird syllable preference thing.

And also, have I mentioned that we're lame?

So imagine my SHOCK when both my favorite boy and girl names appeared on the list!!  (I won't say what they are, but if you know me well, you probably already know...so shhhh!)

Maybe we're not so lame, after all!

First, hipster baby names.  Next, this will be J and I on a Saturday night.  Or better yet, on a Sunday afternoon!  The possibilities are ENDLESS!

If you don't care to click over to Babble, here is the full list.

Boys:
1.Brooklyn
2. Ray
3. Holden
4. Iver
5. Allen
6. Lennon
7. Orson
8. Atticus
9. Thelonious
10. Jasper

Girls: 
1. London
2. Wren
3. Matilda
4. Tallulah
5. Margot
6. Clementine
7. Zooey
8. Seraphina
9. Florence
10. Alice

Fall Fashion

Although the air is not yet crisp here in the south, I am in the fall fashion spirit.  I look forward every year to putting away the flips and breaking out the boots, to saying goodbye to pastels in favor of richer colors, to layering without sweating.

I kinda love fall.

This fall, here are the trends that I am loving.

Menswear-inspired shoes.  I. WANT. THESE.

Romantic blouses.  Especially those with a beautiful bow.

Pleated skirts.  So figure flattering!

Blazers are back!

Statement pants.  What a great way to add color to your wardrobe. 

Now if only I could afford all these great fashion finds.  It's really too bad I didn't have the good sense to marry rich.  ;)

Today Sucks

This school year I'm working a new calendar.  One that occasionally lets me "track out."  This means that I have a week off here and there, in exchange for working ever so slightly longer hours (i.e. quittin' time is now 12:10 instead of 11:45).

Last week, I was tracked out.  And it was wonderful.  I celebrated my anniversary, and then spent the rest of the week gloriously reveling in every moment that I  got to take care of that sweet child-o-mine.

Today I came back to work.  And it sucks.

Please don't judge me for pouting about having to work until noon each day, while still receiving sporadic weeks off.  The thing is, I don't want to leave the nugget on a daily basis, no matter how short the time.  No matter how great the babysitter.  No matter how quickly I am there to pick him up.  It kills me to say goodbye to him every morning, and I just don't wanna do it.

I am cut from the cloth of a stay-at-home-mama, but unfortunately, my bank account is holding me back, and just won't allow that to be a reality at the moment.

SO, anybody have any get-rich-quick schemes that they can recommend?  Because I could really use one right about now...

No?

Well then, back to work, I guess.  Sigh.
 

Movie Review: Bridesmaids

J and I have both said that the thing we miss the most since having a baby is going to the movie theater.  (Well, actually, J says that money is the thing he misses the most, but the movies come in a close second.)

We had a free 24 hours to celebrate our anniversary, so a trip to the movies was definitely on the agenda.  As all of the current movies seem to be utter crap, we checked out the old stuff playing at the $1.50 theater.  For months, we have heard so much buzz surrounding the movie "Bridesmaids", so we decided to check it out.

I have to say that after all of the buzz, I expected more.

Don't get me wrong- this movie was funny.  The cast was made up of some seriously funny women.  But it just wasn't hilarious at every turn like I expected it to be.  I wanted another "The Hangover".  This just wasn't it for me.

For me, the highlight of the movie was Melissa McCarthy.  She stole the show.  Her character Megan was by far the funniest of the bunch.  Her story about falling off the cruise ship and her interactions with the air marshal had me laughing out loud.

But the rest of the film was just alright.

I fear that for me (and J), this one may have been a little over-hyped.

Food Rut

As I have written about food and cooking many times before, you all know that I love to cook.  But lately, I am finding myself in a food rut.

I am sick of the same old recipes week in and week out.

J is of absolutely no help here.  Every week I ask him  if there is anything he feels like for dinner in the upcoming week.  I can count on his answer being either "not really" or "meatloaf."  Hmph.

Although I love meatloaf (and coincidentally have it on this week's menu), I am in need of some new ideas.  I won't get rid of my tried and true, but I need some new dishes to add to the mix.

After all, one can only eat so many meatloafs before one wants to throw said meatloaf out the window.

Can anyone out there in the blogosphere be a pal and throw some recipes my way?  I'd be eternally grateful, and you may save the life of a poor, innocent meatloaf.  Consider it your good deed for the day.

Wal-Mart, You So Crazy

On a recent trip to Wal-Mart, I saw this machine and just had to take a picture.

Notice the tag line..."The smart place to manage your money."

Is it really?  I mean, do people fall for this?  Do they think, "Hmm, I have come into a large sum of money.  However shall I manage it?  I know!  I'll go to Wal-Mart!  They'll know what to do!"

Is Wal-Mart a smart place to manage anything, for that matter?  I think not.  Target?  Maybe.  But Wal-Mart?  NO.

**By the way, I realize that it's shocking that I was even in Wal-Mart in the first place, but fear not.  I have not embraced Wally World after all these years.  I merely had to visit to exchange some gifts.  My opinion remains the same- and that is, I feel dirty and full of shame upon leaving the store, every time.

To My Favorite Person

Two years ago today, we were married.  Such a happy day.  A day filled with much love and laughter, anticipation and dreams realized.

J, when I am down, you are my up.  When I am scared, you are my courage.  When I am nervous, you are my calm.  When I am angry, you are my peace.  And when I am full of joy, you add to that joy until I feel that I just might burst.  

It's true, what they say in the movies.  You complete me.

You are the best husband, and now that best father, that I ever could have wished for in a million, trillion years. And if it's possible, I love you even more now than I did on that day two years ago.

Happy Anniversary, my love.

Fiber

Yep, I needs it.

Since having a baby, things just don't work the same as they did before.  My insides got all scrunched up, and then unscrunched themselves in such a way that more fiber is now required in order for them to work.

Such is life.

I've written about the Benefiber in my morning coffee.  Good stuff.

But the other day I discovered these:

Let me just say, the commercials do not lie.  Cardboard?  No.  Delicious?  Yes.  I mean, really, really good stuff.

So for my other oldster friends who are in need of a little more fiber in your diets?  Go out and buy these immediately.  You won't regret it.