Saturday, May 7, 2011

Back to Life...Back to Reality

Remember that song?  I had to look up the's Soul II Soul, for any of you who may have been interested.

Week one complete...

I am now officially a working mother.  I went back to work this week  And I survived.

The week leading up to the big, unhappy occasion was terrible.  The anticipation of having to leave my baby was almost more than I could bear.  I cried.  A lot.  By the weekend, I'm pretty sure J was worried for my sanity.  I was one unhappy Mama.

When I woke up on Monday morning, I immediately burst into tears, and told J "I don't wanna go."

But go I did.

I wept in the car as I drove to school.  Whenever anyone welcomed me back or asked how the baby was, my eyes would immediately fill to the brim with fresh tears.  It was a rough day.     

But I had things to do.  Being away from the grind for ten weeks led to a little bit of clean-up when I returned.  There were lessons to be written, an e-mail inbox to be cleaned out, correspondence to be caught up on.  So I tried to say busy with these tasks.

And you know what?  The time passed.  And much more quickly than I had anticipated.

The second that clock hit 11:45 (yes, I only work part-time, THANK GOD), I was out the door.  By 12:00, I was home.  I had made it.

The mornings got easier and easier as we made our way through the week.  By Tuesday,  I had already stopped crying when I walked out the door.  By Thursday, I was no longer crying in the car.  And by week's end, I almost felt okay about going to work.

I remind myself every day that this is only temporary.  That I am working right now to help get our finances in a better place so that one day I'll be able to stay at home with our child(ren).  I remind myself to be thankful that I only need to work part-time, and that I am so lucky to have every afternoon with my little punkin.

I expect for things to keep getting easier as the weeks pass, however, I don't think this will ever feel natural to me.  But I will do what I have to do.

Now that I've taken on the first week, and lived to tell the tale...I know I can make it.

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...