Reasons I Know I'm Getting Old

Aside from gray hair and arthritis (both of which I have, by the way), there have been a few other instances lately that have given me pause...

And I've said to myself, "Self, I do believe you are not as young as you used to be."

Here are a few examples: 

1. I've started referring to people in their twenties as "kids."  As in, when a 25-year-old took a job at my school, I went home and told J about the "new kid at work."  WTF?
2. I put powdered fiber in my morning coffee.  Every day.  And it's true, what they say about Benefiber!  Dissolves completely and is absolutely tasteless!  No grit!  (Mental head slap.)
3. I positively crave a lush, green lawn.  What youngster cares about how the lawn looks?  I actually look longingly at other lawns, with an all-consuming jealousy.  Next thing you know, I'll be yelling at children to get off the grass and play in the street.
4. Gone are the days when the plusher the mattress, the better.  I am sad that we don't have a firmer mattress in the house.  I thought it was just pregnancy that made me hate the soft bed, but alas, no.  It's just my old, creaky bones.
5. I'm really excited when I can go out and do something fun on the weekend...and still be home and in bed by 10:00.

Damn, I'm old.