Happy Birthday to the One Who Made Me a Mom

Today my best boy turns 8.

What a year it has been for Gabe.  He is in a weird in-between spot.  Sometimes I think he's so little and innocent.  Sometimes I feel like I have a teenager on my hands.  And sometimes I think he's just a mini-man. 

The in-between.  That's where we're at.

Gabe is a lot of wonderful things.  He has such a good heart, and is full of kindness.  He wants the best of everything for everyone.  He is ultra-responsible.  He always does the right thing, and when things need to be taken care of, he's your man.  He values his friendships above all other things. 

He is also extremely sensitive.  He feels a lot of feelings, and he feels them BIG.  This isn't always easy (for him, or us!).  When he's angry, sad, or worried, you will definitely know it.  There have been a couple of slammed doors and sleepless nights as he's tried to learn how to deal with all of these big emotions in a healthy way. There have been times he's been in trouble for his attitude, and then there are times when he beats himself up without a word from us (like when he was jealous that it was Margot's birthday, and then he was overcome with sadness because he felt bad that he was jealous- he even has feelings about his own feelings).

When he's feeling particularly moody, he likes to go his room and listen to his music- which lately is all Panic at the Disco.  His iPod is his most prized possession, and the Apple Music subscription gives him access to all the rock music his ears can handle. 

If this is 8, I'm having a hard time imagining what will happen when hormones actually kick in.

On the flip side, he still has so much innocence.  He likes to race his RC sports cars and dream about the day he'll own a Bugatti or a McLaren.  He has recently gotten into Harry Potter, and likes to cast spells with his pretend wand.  He loves video games.  Sometimes he'll build an "epic" car track (epic is his word choice for all things he considers cool) and race his Hot Wheels around his bedroom.  He likes to draw.  He likes to climb on the jungle gym outside and ride his bike down big hills and jump on the trampoline for hours.

And then I remember that he's still just a little boy.

Oh, Gabe.  

You keep us on our toes in a way we didn't see coming, but I guess that's parenting.  Watching you grow and change and mature isn't always easy, but all of the wonderful moments in between the tough ones make it worth it a million times over.  Luckily for us, love is one of those feelings that you feel BIG, and we feel it, too, buddy. 

Happy birthday to you, my firstborn.  I hope this year is your best one yet, and that all your birthday wishes come true.   

The Sweetest Four Year Old

That's my Charlotte.

My heart hurts a little writing this.  Literally just this morning, Facebook showed me this memory:

It will always be one of my very favorite pictures.  Exhausted as I was, I was just so happy.  My tiny little squish, all cuddled up on my chest.  Nothing in this world is better than a baby sleeping on your chest, amIright??

And now she's four.

I just don't understand how time can pass by so quickly.  It's this weird thing that moms have, not wanting their babies to grow up.  And I think with Charlotte being my last, I am even more desperate to hang onto her littleness.  In my mind, age four is a definite switch.  Once they hit four, every trace of baby is gone, and they are now just kids. 

Don't mind me sobbing in the corner over here.

But as much as I wish Charlotte would forever be my tiny baby, it is also pretty great to see her personality continue to develop.  If you have met her, you know she really is just the sweetest.  She has such a kind heart, and is a friend to everyone.  If you haven't met her, I guarantee that she'd charm you in an instant. 

She is charming.

This past year has been a big one for her.  She started school, which was a dream come true for her.  If she wants anything in life, it's to do the things her big siblings do.  If they can do it, she is sure she can do it.  She's paid her dues, watching them get go to school or dance class or to a friend's house to play.  She is beyond thrilled that she can now do those things, as well.

She is fashionable.  She has strong opinions about what she'll wear.  Don't even try to hand this one jeans and a shirt.  If it's not a dress (preferably with a tutu), she's not interested.  Sneakers?  Nope.  Only slip-on dress shoes.  No socks, thankyouverymuch.  And the accessories- oh, the accessories.  She won't be caught without them.  Even while she sleeps.

She loves princesses and unicorns and kittens and pink and purple.  And she loves her best friend Margot more than ice cream. 

And perhaps my favorite thing about her is she loves to cuddle.  She may not be as tiny as she was in that Facebook memory, but she still loves to snuggle in.

Charlotte Marie, my beautiful baby, I love you so much sometimes I think my heart just might explode.  Happy 4th birthday. 

My Current Downfall

Friends, we have a serious problem in my house.  I'm reaching out here because I know we are not alone.  I feel confident that I can find support in my community, and perhaps some resources to help us make it through this season.

It's Girl Scout Cookie time.

Girl Scout GIF from Girlscout GIFs

I know pretty much everyone has a weakness for Girl Scout cookies.  They see those sweet little girls at their table outside the Walmart and stock up on Thin Mints to put in the freezer and eat by the sleeve.

I used to be one of those people.  And aside from the Thin Mints, I was also in love with the Peanut Butter Sandwiches.  Side note: back in my day, we called them Do-Si-Dos, and that is what they forever will be known as in my heart.

Then one year I decided I didn't need any cookies.  I was going to stay strong and resist the temptation.  Of course, this meant not answering the door for the entire month of February and practically wearing a blindfold whilst walking in and out of every store in town.  Because, you know, once I make eye contact I become incapable of saying no.

And then the Thanks-a-Lots came into existence.  Damn it.

I happened to be pregnant that year, and I blame that sweet baby Charlotte and the cravings that she caused for this current issue in my home.

At first glance, these cookies aren't too troublesome.  It's just a simple shortbread, after all- with a heavenly chocolate coating on the bottom.  The real trouble came about when I had the idea to dip the cookie into my coffee one morning.  (Yes, I said morning.  I was pregnant.  I could eat cookies for breakfast if I wanted.)  It was all downhill from there.

J was immediately on board.  There are few things in life he loves more than dippable cookies.  I can't remember exactly how many boxes we went through that first year.  I can tell you it was definitely more than one would consider "healthy."  We would open a package, split it down the middle, and breakfast was served.  (I think that's probably how I grew the sweetest baby on the block that year.)

Since then, we've made progress.  And by progress, I mean that now we have a third adult in the house, so we split the package into three servings instead of two.

I may need an intervention.

   

 

The Times, They Are A'Changin'

I can remember a time, not so long ago, that I looked for any excuse not to exercise.  It was hard.  I didn't like it.  I was mostly just lazy and didn't wanna.  So I didn't.  And I was tired all the time, overweight, and generally unhappy with myself as a result.  One day I got sick of feeling that way and decided to make some changes. 

 I don't post these pictures to brag or to seek compliments.  I post them so I don't forget, don't get complacent, and remember that all of the hard work was worth it.  And maybe to motivate myself to lose those last few holiday pounds.  Seriously, have you guys tried Puppy Chow (the chocolate, peanut butter and powdered sugar coated Chex kind)?  It's my December weakness.  Also Christmas cookies and celebratory alcoholic beverages.   

Anywho...

I know you've heard the story before, so I won't rehash the whole thing.  But yesterday I stopped to think about how crazy different my life is now than it used to be.

Meet my new friend.

First I had to be patient and wait until the first of the year to order (thanks, Microsoft, for your yearly contribution towards our health!).  Then I had to wait weeks for it to arrive.  Then I had to wait for J to get home and put it together- some assembly required for sure.  Then I was finally able to take it for a test ride and I am in love.

I already knew I'd love it.  This is a newer version of the same bike I ride at the gym.  Since being forced to cut back on running, I had to find an alternative, and I've really grown to love cycling.  Spin class is a crazy good workout, and is no doubt easier on my old lady knees.  I've spent quite a bit of time in the cycling studio, and now I'll be able to enjoy this type of workout at home, too.
  
All of this contributes to my big news.  I'm going back to teaching, just in a different sort of classroom.  In a couple of weeks I will spend the weekend on a similar bike, getting certified to instruct indoor cycling classes at my gym.  Yesterday my training materials arrived, and I was positively giddy.  (Today is supposed to be a rest day for me, but I know I won't be able to resist getting on the bike to try out my assigned tracks.)

I've already spent time on the bike designing workouts.  I bought a notebook to keep my ideas organized.  I've created playlists.  I've thought about themes.  Guys, I'm kind of geeking out about becoming a spin instructor!

The Betsey of a few years ago would look at the Betsey of today and ask "Who IS this person??"  But you know what?  I kinda like her.  

It's SO Winter

You know how I know?  EVERYONE IS SICK.

It started with Margot.  Just a cold with all of its annoying symptoms.  The most annoying of all was certainly the lingering cough.

It moved onto Charlotte, although her was mild compared to big sister's.  Then Gabe got it, fierce.  Then me.  And finally J.

I kid you not.  We are going on week three now, and the coughing has not stopped.  We have our own little choir going on, with morning and evening coughs of varying pitches and timbres, sopranos, altos, and tenors and baritones all represented.  I'm here to tell you that after having three kids. those muscles that control the bladder are not as strong as they used to be.  Don't mind me, I'll just be over here just trying not to pee while I'm hacking my lungs up.

We've been in various degrees of disrepair for somewhere around a month now, but the light was visible at the end of the tunnel.  All of us had our turn, and had either gotten over it, or at least weren't totally miserable anymore (for me and Gabe, this was more than annoying- we just felt BAD for several days). 

Then Margot came home from school on Friday coughing again.  And she just couldn't stop.  And then the fever hit.

Here I am, thinking the flu had hit.  Yes, we got flu shots as we do every year.  But they are no guarantee.  Poor Margot had the flu last year, and I was pretty sure she had it again.  Her fever hit 104 and she was down for the count.

How does this happen to my poor kid?  Oh, right- it was only a few months ago that I had to ask her to stop licking the soles of her shoe.  BARF.

I am happy to report that several hours in urgent care and a chest x-ray later, she was negative for both flu and pneumonia.  It's just another ugly virus that will probably make its rounds through my house.  And luckily Margot is a BEAST and is already back up and running.

But still coughing.

If you need me, I'll just be coating the house with Lysol and praying for Spring.

See what I did there?

Happy Birthday, Honey Badger

Miss Margot is 6!

(I know I'm a few days late with this, but I've had the cold from hell.  Forgive me.)

This year has been such a fun one with my dearest middle child.  She started kindergarten this year, and is suddenly even more independent than before- which I did not know was possible.  She took to school like a fish takes to water.  She got on that bus the first day of school- yes, the VERY FIRST day of school- and hasn't looked back since.  She loves it, which makes me so very happy.

Although she loves school and is very bright, it is not all smooth sailing.  Her work habits leave something to be desired.  That's the nice way of saying that girlfriend is a disorganized slob.  She constantly forgets to bring home her water bottle, her papers are a crumpled mess, her bedroom is a certified disaster area.  SHE SPILLS HER DRINK EVERY SINGLE DAY.  But she is a happy-go-lucky kinda gal, and neatness just isn't something she concerns herself with.

I feel confident saying that her best friend is her sister.  Charlotte and Margot play together so well.  I think they'd be lost without each other.  They play school, they play dress-up, they pretend that they're kitties or unicorns (or better yet, uni-kitties).  They have "sister sleepovers" on the weekends.  They are truly BFF's.  Nothing could possibly make me happier.

Margot has lost some of her sass and gained some sweetness this year.  Guys, I think she likes me more than she used to.  She tells me that she misses me when she's at school!  Sometimes she cuddles with me on the couch.  I get random hugs.  She asks to do things together, just the two of us.  It's hard to carve out one-on-one time with the kids, and especially the middle child.  But when she asks to do something together, I make it happen.

Margot is funny.  She's strong.  She's smart.  She's still a beast (and if looks could kill, she'd destroy you with a glance).  She's unique.  And she's still not out to please anyone but herself.  And that's my favorite thing about her.

I can't wait to see what this next year brings for my Margot Claire, whom I adore with every ounce of my being.    

It's 2019, Yo

It's a new year.  Let's catch up!

We spent a wonderful holiday season together.  The kids were home, Jason had some time off of work, we had a revolving door of family members here to visit.  It was a lovely end to a CUH-RAZY month.  Guys, I mommed so hard, trying to prepare the perfect Christmas for all of my loved ones.  I am not complaining- I love Christmas, and all of the magic that comes along with it.  But it's a lot of work.  Shopping, wrapping, baking, gifting, planning activities, class parties, watching ALL OF THE CHRISTMAS MOVIES.  (J is a real hard ass when it comes to the Christmas movies.  There can be NO Christmas programming on the TV before we have finished the Thanksgiving turkey, and really, I want to watch Elf once a week.  So in December, I do.  Also, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.)  It was a great time full of food, drink, family, and love.

Meanwhile, I've kept up running as much as my knee will allow (which honestly, isn't that much- BOO.)  But before my knee started to crap out, I did a couple of things.  I ran my first beer mile.  Chug a beer, run a quarter of a mile, repeat x 4.  It was super amazing fun.  I was a little nervous coming into it, because it had been somewhere in the neighborhood of 15 years since I've chugged a beer.  But as it turns out, it's just like riding a bike!  Y'all, this girl can CHUG.  I was the third place female finisher.  I could have maybe come in second, but I was too nervous to look down at my watch to check my pace.  Next year, I'm moving up the ranks.

I also won my first age group award!  I was initially feeling a little sad and left out that I wasn't able to run my beloved Holly Springs Half Marathon.  But when race day came and I was gearing up to run the 5k, I realized there was a benefit to being one of those running the short race- all of the fast, distance runners were running the half, leaving not that many people behind for the shorter race.  I considered for the first time that maybe I could place in the top three ladies in my age group.  And I did it!  I came in FIRST.  It felt great, and for the first time I considered some new running goals that don't involve long distances.

Technically, J beat me by 2 seconds.  But official race results list me before him, so basically I win.

There have been activities galore.  We went to the state fair and a pumpkin farm, I saw Hamilton (AMAZING!), it snowed for a hot minute and the kiddos got soaked, we had a girls day at The Nutcracker, we moved a bunch of stuff from one home to another...

That's right!  We have a new roommate.  My sister moved in a few weeks ago.  She'll be staying with us while she finishes grad school.  My kids are pretty much obsessed with her, which is fine, because she's obsessed with them right back.  We're excited to have a built-in babysitter.  Also, watch out world, because our Wonder Twin powers are activating.  We have serious twin telepathy going on since becoming roomies.  Yes, I know we are ten years apart, but twinsies nonetheless.

That's a tiny nutshell of all of our goings-on, but maybe now that life is getting back to normal (kids in school, yay!), I'll have spare time in an amount longer than 1.4 seconds.

Happy new year and love to all in 2019!