Wednesday, August 28, 2013


I won't miss him. 

You guys, he's seriously so bizarre. He has a 2-car garage and a nice driveway. The driveway remains empty almost always, as he chooses to park his car on the street. 

That car, until very recently, has been a beater. I mean, an OLD, rusty, Toyota. Maybe a Tercel?  I always assumed he parked it on the street because it leaked oil, and he didn't want to stain his driveway. 

Once a month or so, weirdo would open his garage and back his showpiece out of the garage.  He'd take the cover off to wash her, and then once she was clean, he'd pull her right back into the garage.  I'd seen him drive her maybe 3 times, ever. She's that special to him. 

Guys- it's a Saturn. 

I couldn't make this up if I tried. 

But times next door, they are a-changin'. The beater must have finally bit the dust, because this is the new street view next door. 

That's right, the Saturn has moved up in the world!  That is now his daily driver. Why the half-assed cover, you ask?  No idea. And yes, the cover is always half-assed. Why doesn't he park it in the driveway, since his special vehicle most certainly doesn't leak? It's a mystery. 

Oh, and I almost forgot. He has a new baby hidden in the garage. He brought her out for a bath last weekend. It's a shiny new Camry. 

This guy's fascination with mediocrity is beyond me. 

Here's to more normal neighbors in the new 'hood. 

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